What have I been up to?

What have I been up to? Not much I guess……….
1.Golf: I have been working on my golf game quite a bit this summer. I have been going out about twice a week now for the last month or two. It is a really neat to be able to play with my in-laws and my buddies from work. I’m not great; in fact, I’m not even that good. I’m proud of my self though; I have improved my average score. This year I’m shooting right at about a 52 for nine. Hey, I still beat my father and mother-in-law (that’s all that matters).
2. Mini-vacation: This week my wife’s family is in town from Buffalo and my mom is in town on business, so I'm taking a little six-day vacation. My work stress level is pretty high right now because I am the only La-Z-Boy technician at our store, and that did not make leaving this last weekend any easier. But now that I’m away I’m starting to wonder what all the fuss was about anyway…
3. Classic run: Saturday July 26^th I ran the Classic Grand Prix 10k run here in Colorado Springs. I didn’t do well at all. In fact I totally huffed and puffed my to the finish line. I ran it in 58:20, which is a 9:20 mile. That sucks ass, considering the race is downhill! I finished in 252^nd place. And to add injury to insult, I really strained the arch in my right foot so I have been limping all this week. Hey, but I ran it and I didn’t stop. Lets see you try next time….
4. Supporting our friend JR: Mallory and I have decided to support our friend JR Briggs with our church tithe money. JR is venturing out onto his own starting his own church in Pennsylvania (something he never thought he would do). For those of you who aren’t sure who JR is, he was the groom’s man in our wedding. We have decided to withdrawal our current contribution to our church and use it where we feel it would best serve God and his community. (Check out his blog, it’s in my favorites list).
5. Medical bills!!!: Talk about stress, we just put over $2100 in the mail for medical bills. Our current insurance is a pain in the butt, but it works a little bit and it has really low monthly premiums…
6. Motivation is dwindling: My motivation is severely dwindling. I always feel overwhelmed and exhausted. Even on vacation this week I feel out of control. My life is so busy that I want to half ass everything. I have no drive or motivation to finish or complete anything. Even normal household chores are daunting. I just want to sit on my fat butt and let the world pass by sometimes.
7. House work: speaking of daunting chores, we have this stupid yard thing that is always haunting us. This year I have been consumed on my days off with the yard. We have a really high maintenance HOA that is bugging the piss out of everyone, and so the expectation of the yard has become overwhelming. But week-by-week we’re making it work. We still have the back yard patio to build though. I will be so happy when I don’t have that haunting me anymore.
8. Baby dedication: Ethan Michael had his baby dedication this past Sunday. It is not a baptism. We, as his parents, understand that we cannot pronounce salvation for him. That is a decision he will have to make on his own, and baptism is a sign of that decision. Instead this was a time of celebration for us as new parents; a time were we can make a covenant before God and our family to do the best we can in raising him in truth and light. It turned out to be a very short but very intimate and touching ceremony. Ethan and Mallory where so adorable, as always!
9. Drinking a lot of beer: I have been drinking a lot of beer lately. In fact I have just been drinking a lot lately. My soda consumption is sky high and my alcohol intake is not much better. Is it any wonder I have liver issues? The doctor called me again yesterday to tell me my liver enzymes are elevated still. This is something I have been struggling with for months now. So I have to go in for a liver-ultra-sound to make sure there is nothing going on down there. Mallory mentioned to me that it probably wouldn’t hurt to stop drinking. I think she is right, but I don’t want to. What would life be like without the soda and beer? Would I function differently? Could this be what is behind my lack of motivation and slow running speeds?

Maturity, me?

It took me 27 years but I finally admitted it. Yesterday I came to the realization that I don't want to grow up. I desperately hold on to immaturity, not wanting to give it up for an appropriate adult/parent lifestyle. I struggle with being the man I know I should be and the man I tend to revert to to avoid life. I have a habit of running away from life and looking to temporary highs to get me by. Obnoxiously goofing around, drinking, control, lustful desires, anger, you name it... I know this is not just how I was wired because all these things leave me feeling empty and stupid.

The issues becomes: How do I let go of the temptations to grab real fulfillment? How do I let go of the matchbox car so I can hold my dads hand? If ever there is a time for God to work, it is now!

The year of living biblically

I just finished The Year Of Living Biblically, by AJ Jacobs. What an awesome book! I loved it and look forward to reading it again. I highly recommend it. It's not your typical modern day action packed thriller, instead it is just a guy wrestling with life and the good book.

AJ spent his year trying to fulfill the bible literally and interviewing every denomination he could manage to get his hands on. A fascinating observation he made throughout his year: The year showed me beyond a doubt that everyone practices cafeteria religion (picking and choosing what we want). It's not just moderates. Fundamentalists do it too. They can't heap everything onto their plate...

The right wing

Right now I’m almost finished reading AJ Jacobs book “The year of living biblically.” I love it. AJ has a Jewish background and spends a year on a quest to meet the God of the Bible. He seems comfortable with the Old Testament rituals but hesitant with the New Testament. He knows his hesitation has a lot to do with his family heritage but he is also reserved because of Christian fundamentalists and confusion within its own camp. It is so awesome for me to get such a fresh view on things. Here’s a man committed to literally fulfilling every command and suggestion in the bible but not so sure Christianity is the real deal. AJ has helped me to step back and see the Jewish tradition and history within the bible. It has also helped me to see the political and self-willed agenda Christianity carries with it. Christianity seems so politically aligned that maybe we have forgotten the bible. I know I have. I spent so much time creating my own little stereotypical God, that I forgot how big life is. My mascot-god, my pocket size version, god created in my image. When my mascot couldn’t deliver what I wanted, I gave up on God. When I asked my genie for three wishes and got nothing, I could no longer believe in God. I was so busy speaking for God, I never knew who he was. My political agenda became priority. I find myself bitter with the church for having the same motivation as myself. I think that is what leaves me so frustrated with Christianity, political corruption. Everyone wants it their way and thinks they have some kind of insiders edge…

“Many of us in the evangelical community believe that evangelical Christianity has become captured and enslaved by the religious right, It’s loyalty seems to be more to the platform of the republican party than to the radical teachings of Jesus.”